The Venom We Bleed

The Venom We Bleed

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Nolan

15 years old…

Most people fear death. When it inevitably comes for them, they cry, kick, scream, and sometimes pray to some otherworldly being to help them—to give them just a little more time. I don’t understand why. Clearly no one’s fucking listening. No one ever listens.

“Stop screaming!” Lex barks down at the man beneath us covered in his own blood, piss, and vomit. “It’s giving me a fucking headache.”

I have little sympathy for Xavier Pierce, but Lex has even less. When my father doesn’t stop wailing about the gushing wound in his leg where the bone protrudes past the skin, covered in dirt and blood clinging to the pearl-white surface, Lex bends over into the hole and punches him in the head. I repress a snort.

Thud. Thud. Thud. It takes three blows for my father to shut the fuck up. He curls into a ball and tries to hide, covering his head and protecting himself from more of Lex’s wrath. I’m surprised he hasn’t passed out by now.

Thanks to him, I’m intimately aware that broken bones hurt like a bitch. The pain of having one of your bones snapped in half and protrude through your fucking skin rips through your mind and makes it hard to focus on anything else except the fire burning over you. There’s nothing you can do—not unless your father lets your mom help you, lets her drive you to the hospital to get fixed up—but he didn’t because the fucker didn’t want any cops or CPS knocking on his door. Three whole fucking days I’d waited until Mom grew brave enough to sneak me out in the middle of the night.

Now, it’s my turn. I can’t fucking wait to finish him off.

“Where the fuck is G?” I mutter, turning my back on the bloodied and sobbing man.

Almost as soon as I ask that question, a single dull headlight grows visible on the drive and the broken stuttering of a cheap dirt bike announces our friend’s arrival. The headlight bumps up and down as he rides the hills, slowing as he gets to the ramshackle old cabin that Lex had inherited from his folks when they died. No one ever comes out here. No one ever even remembers this place. Not surprising considering his new ‘guardian’ is his aunt who forgets he exists most of the time.

Way to go, justice system; you really pulled through on repeat—first with my dad and then with Lex’s family and G’s. Well, we’ll deal with his dad eventually. Even snot-nosed kids need to practice patience or so my mom says.

I’m grateful for this shithole tonight. It’s far enough away from our town of Silverwood that people hardly recall that there’s a mountain up here with a bunch of hunting cabins. It’s not a good area for hunting anyway—not since a pack of wolves moved in some years back, and there’s no money in hunting up in the boonies anyway. All the rich folks of Silverwood prefer their country clubs and business conferences.

Blackstone Mountain is the perfect place for our purposes, though, especially tonight.

Gio’s dirt bike dies several yards away from where the dilapidated old cabin strikes a haunting figure on the hill, and it’s only then that I realize my father is quiet. I crouch and stare into the hole that we forced him to dig before shoving him into it—the result now being his broken leg.

“He passed out,” Lex says, and I see the truth of his announcement in my father’s limp body. “What a pussy.” My flashlight reveals the blood still oozing down his side. The moon above our heads is hardly enough light to see more than hints of the gruesome scene before us.

“Shit—fuck!” G curses loudly and comes stumbling towards us with two shovels in hand and a backpack. He doesn’t seem to care about being heard. Why should he? There’s no one out here. “Do you know how hard it was to bring this shit back on the bike?” he demands, pushing one handle at Lex before offering the other to me.

I shake my head at him and he groans before dropping the backpack and heading over to the mound of dirt my father had dug up an hour before. The shovel we’d forced him to use lies somewhere on the ground, splintered in several pieces.

The grunts of my best friends, as they begin to sling dirt into the hole, echo up the trees around us. The sound sinks into my ears. I close my eyes as it settles into my muscles and bones, letting it turn into the sensation of pure, unadulterated power. Something I’ve never fucking wielded before, much less over my father—it’s heady, addicting.

Like so many of the deadbeats from Silverwood, Xavier Pierce will simply disappear. No one will look for him or wonder where he went. Everyone will assume he ran off to avoid his responsibilities to my mom who was too good for him and me, the kid who didn’t deserve his wrath. Deep down, everyone will know that we’re better off for his loss.

I hold up a hand to stop the other two. Lex and Gio’s fast shoveling comes to a standstill while I reach into the back waistband of my jeans. The weight of the gun that Darrio Vargas, G’s dad, had given me just yesterday when I’d agreed to work for him is lighter than I expect.

I lift the gun. My father’s eyes flutter open. A part of me had hoped he would remain unconscious for this part. Awake or not, my decision is already made. His flat brown eyes, too much like my own, are fogged over with pain, yet they settle on me as I aim the Glock at him.

My hand doesn’t even shake as I pull the trigger, but he does. The gun jerks in my hand as the gunshot echoes up the giant oaks that surround us and out towards the open field behind Lex’s cabin, and I grimace as the kickback vibrates up my arm. Darrio had warned me that it’d do that, but it’s still a bit of a jarring sensation. My father’s body jolts as the bullet slams into his head, sending a spray of crimson liquid out the back of his skull to disappear into the earth. With a combination of the flashlight and the moonlight as my guide, I scan the bits and pieces of brain matter combined with skull fragments embedded into the ground like a halo around his head.

Stabbing the end of his shovel into the dirt, Lex props himself up with folded arms over the handle. I lower the gun. Several minutes pass in silence as the heat from firing it dissipates. Only once it doesn’t feel like a brand in my grip do I tuck it into my waistband, pulling my t-shirt out a bit to cover it.

“That’s it then?” Lex asks, canting his head in my direction.

When I don’t answer, G speaks up. “You’re really gonna work for that bastard?”

My gaze cuts towards him. “It’s not forever,” I assure him. There’s no way in hell I’d ever let myself live under another man’s thumb the way I’ve lived under my father’s.

Gio stares into the darkened hole at the body. I expect to feel something when I follow his gaze. Regret maybe? Remorse or guilt. Yet, only a bone-deep relief fills me. I’ve never been one for sad sack poetry or some shit like what our English teachers force us to read for “education,” but at this moment, I think I truly understand how some skinny starving artist types came up with all of their flowery words.

Writing was their release from a prison only they could see. Mine, it turns out, is killing.

“He’s going to know you shot that gun,” Gio murmurs. “He checks when they’re returned to him.”

“I don’t care.” I’m not afraid of Darrio Vargas. After tonight, I can’t imagine being afraid of anyone ever again. I just put a bullet in the head of my demon. What else matters?

Gio doesn’t respond right away, but his brows crease, forming twin lines between his eyes. I let my gaze drift back to the hole and the half-buried body there. If he could, G would do the same to his father. There are only two things that keep Darrio Vargas’ heart beating:

One, Gio’s mother still loves the bastard and forgives him for all of the insane shit he does to both of them. Two, Gio’s respect for me.

Taking a step towards G, I hold my hand out. “His time will come,” I assure him.

Gio stares at my outstretched arm before slowly raising his gaze to mine. “He keeps shit on everyone who works for him, Nolan,” Gio says, his voice deeper than usual. “That’s how he keeps them in line. He’ll know what you used the gun he gave you for, and he’ll use it against you.”

I don’t drop my arm, not even when my muscles begin to burn. Gio’s words aren’t a warning, they’re a fact. It’s too late now. Showing any sign of weakness or regret will only ruin all that we’ve done here tonight.

“Your father and I have an understanding,” I say. Not dad, because that’s not what the man is. “Despite what he’d have you believe, he’s not infallible.” Gio’s honey-brown eyes glaze over, the minuscule light refracting off the sheen of tears there. “Trust me,” I urge him, nudging him with my hand. His own lifts and we clasp forearms. I let the warmth of his skin on mine seep into my skin. “We’ll use him until we graduate, earn as much money as his dirty profits can afford us, and then we’re out of this shithole town.”

“You want us to leave Silverwood?” Lex asks abruptly, turning to face us fully.

“Yes.” I tighten my grip on G’s arm when he moves to release me. His gaze meets mine and I speak—talking to both of them, but forcing G to hear my words and know their sincerity. “The three of us are getting the fuck out of Silverwood. We’re going to make money and we’ll go somewhere else. Somewhere far away.” Where no one knows us as monsters or victims or eyes us with pity or fear. “But until then”—I bore into Gio’s gaze, refusing to let go—“we’re going to rule this fucking town and everyone in it.”

Gio’s brow relaxes and the hold he has on me becomes stronger, his grip tightening once again. One hard squeeze, then I release him and he steps back.

“Fuck them,” he finally says, eyes sparking with something sinister—something that matches my own dark pride. “Fuck Xavier, fuck Darrio, and fuck everyone else that thinks we’re garbage. We’re gonna be the fucking Kings of Silverwood.”

I nod. “Then we’ll leave it all behind,” I agree. “Until that day comes, though, no one will ever step on us again.”

Lex remains silent for some time. His eyes are pitch black, sinking into the shadows around us as he glares at me.

I sigh. “You don’t give a fuck about Silverwood,” I remind him. “You have no ties to it other than G and me.”

“What about her?” he spits out, anger coating his words.

My upper lip curls back. Her? He’s fucking concerned about her? “She’s nothing,” I snap back. “She doesn’t even know you fucking exist. Let her go.”

A low, animalistic growl erupts from his throat and Lex’s shovel drops to the ground as he stalks towards me. Gio curses and steps between us. I stand tall and straight, waiting. I’ll be fucking damned if I shrink away from his violence now.

“Lex, man, stop!” G presses a hand into Lex’s chest and the other man halts, though he continues to lean against the light hold.

“She’s not nothing,” Lex snaps. “She’s mine.”

“She’s a distraction,” I reply, crossing my arms. “Do you honestly think she’ll give you the time of day?”

The specter of this damned girl haunts the air between us, a sore reminder of Lex’s obsession with someone he can never have.

Juliet Donovan.

Her face comes to mind, pretty golden hair with dark roots and eyes the color of the clearest sky. She’s far too perfect for someone like him—like any of us. Rich. Beautiful. Unattainable. I can’t say I blame Lex for his one-sided infatuation with her, but it’s been ten fucking years. Ten years since kindergarten and the one year that kids like us—poor, grubby, and damaged—were allowed to be in the same class as those on the other side of the tracks before Silverwood Prep had been finished.

“She was nice to you once, asshole,” I gripe. “She pitied you.” Somehow the bastard latched on to her and hasn’t let go even though they haven’t even spoken since then.

“You don’t know her!” Lex leans harder against Gio, earning a grunt from our more reasonable friend.

I scoff. “And you do?”

“I know everything about her!” Lex snaps. “I know her favorite color, her favorite food. I know who she’s friends with and I know about her nightmares.”

“Because you fucking stalk her.” I bite out the words, loosening the hold of my folded arms to let them fall back to my sides. “Tell me something, Lex, if she’s so fucking important, why haven’t you asked her out yet? Why let her date those stuck-up pricks at Silverwood Prep if she’s so important?”

Lex goes still for a moment, and then, as if my words have the effect of a needle piercing a balloon, he deflates and steps back from Gio’s hold. He doesn’t answer me, not right away, but when he does speak, it’s with a low voice that I have to strain to hear. “You don’t know her like I do,” he whispers. “She’s different … she’s not like them.”

I close my eyes and inhale a deep breath. The only difference about Juliet Donovan lies in the fact a veritable psychopath loves her. Or as much as any of us can love. I suppose I shouldn’t be surprised. The three of us have always needed something to latch on to in order to get through our days. Lex doesn’t have parents like G and I do. So, if his clinging to the dream of Juliet Donovan will keep him sane, then I have to let him.

Three years. That’s all we have to get through anyway. Three more years until we’re out of this life, out of Silverwood, and free from our pasts.

I sigh, then look back at the grave. “You can still watch her from afar,” I say quietly. It’s not like his obsession hasn’t come with upgrades for G and me. Being so close and so far from the girl has allowed Lex the room to study methods through which he can follow her. Building his own computers out of scrap metal. Following her social media. Hacking into video feeds of her in her bedroom, her in class, her … everywhere. Those are skills that when put to other uses, we can take advantage of.

“And if we leave and I want her to come with?” Lex asks.

I grit my teeth. “We are not kidnapping her,” I tell him. Though I have no compunction about stealing someone else’s freedom, Juliet Donovan is far too high profile and I will not let him put us all at risk just for some pussy.

“What if she wants to come?” Lex presses, sounding almost desperate.

Fuck me. That will never happen. The tightness in my jaw eases as I sink into those words. It’ll never happen, so there’s no need to worry.

I straighten and fix Lex with a look. “If Juliet Donovan wants to follow you out of Silverwood when we leave,” I tell them, “then we’ll let her.”

That’s all it takes for Lex’s mood to completely shift. All at once, he goes from a morose, angry bastard to peppy and cheerful. He gives me a brilliant smile and returns to his shovel. Gio glances between the two of us with a hesitant expression, but after a few more moments of watching Lex push more dirt into the hole, he seems to realize that the crisis has been averted and goes back to his own.

I pinch the bridge of my nose and stare up into the shadowy tree tops overhead. One thing those dead poets didn’t have to deal with were brothers. Perhaps, though, that’s why they’re dead now. They didn’t have assholes like these two to pull them out of the darkness. I do.

Because of them, I fear nothing anymore. Not even death.

end of excerpt